


What Are They Doing?

by ImperialRemnant



Series: Shenanigans of the Force Kind [23]
Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015)
Genre: Attempt at Humor, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-07
Updated: 2015-12-07
Packaged: 2018-05-05 11:12:27
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 883
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5373230
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ImperialRemnant/pseuds/ImperialRemnant
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Hux and Phasma are very lost. The Resistance is preparing for battle.</p>
            </blockquote>





	What Are They Doing?

Doodles the rancor now sat in his cage, very drunk, with a teal tutu on. The process of putting on the tutu had been incredibly anti-climactic. Not as difficult as putting it on the gundark. Although the rancor was out of it, which made it thousands times easier. Still, Kylo didn’t feel appeased.  

Some of the Knights and Snoke’s hired scientists were writing what they observed from the rancor.

Yes, it’s not science until it’s written down, Kylo knew that. But he realised why this made him rather uncomfortable. Was it not animal abuse?

Although Snoke would argue it didn’t matter. They were supposed to be _evil_.

But Kylo was just in for this for the fashion (Sith had _great_ fashion sense), the artefacts (What can he say? He loved history. He loved Vader’s mask, and he would certainly like to get a hold of the lightsaber that defector Finn now held) and of course he needed a job because money was important in this society.

Unlatching his lightsaber from his belt, Kylo stared at it, turning it in his hands. Sure, it wasn’t an elegant design. He had based it off a much more ancient look. Unsophisticated, to say the least. The crystal wasn’t cut well either, making the blade unclean. He felt a nudge at his side, looking over to see Rivana there again. She had most certainly taken a liking to him. He petted the lizard, and she fell to the ground beside him, falling asleep.

It seems she’s gotten used to the rancor by now.

* * *

They were so lost. At least Phasma was pretty sure they were. And very screwed. Sure, they had managed to get Kylo’s music box, Hux putting it into his coat right now. But for whatever reason it seemed their comms were broken, the ship communications broken, and they had no idea of their current position.

“We could think of this as a holiday,” Phasma tried to be optimistic. It was hopeless. “Who am I kidding, this is hopeless.”

“Like a wilderness holiday,” Hux said. Phasma looked at him in surprise. Was he actually going to be optimistic for once? “I hate wilderness holidays,” Hux scowled.

Well, maybe not.

“We were still quite close to the Resistance when we crashed,” Phasma said, “Do you think they saw us.”

“Maybe,” Hux said, “We should just walk in a direction and get out of here.”

 “Good idea,” Phasma said.

They headed in opposite directions.

“Phasma, this way!”

“But sir!”

“DON’T ARGUE!”

* * *

Our Resistance trio ran to Leia, who was already waist deep in formulating battle plans. The explained quickly what happened, and they explained _everything_ , even though Poe tried to stop Finn and Rey.

“And we were talking about the whole wed, bed, behead thing-,”

“And Hux and Poe went on a date-,”

“It’s wasn’t a _date_!”

“And we got into a fight-,”

“You’re both explaining this out of order!”

“We saved Poe from certain death-,”

Leia put her hand up to stop them from talking, “All right, so after contacting the Resistance, you came across Kylo Ren, Captain Phasma and General Hux. Kylo and Phasma tried to kill you, Poe went off with Hux. You two stole a shuttle and Poe nearly got himself killed. Then he nearly died again falling out of a tree, you two saved him, and you flew back here in the shuttle which just got stolen by Phasma and Hux.”

How the ever loving fuck she had understood what had been said was beyond any of them. Then again, she was General for a reason.

Leia turned to Poe, “Get ready your fighters, we’re going in.” She then turned to Rey and Finn, “So the Order already knows we’re here, I need you two to go ahead.”

“Why?” Finn asked.

“Luke has let his presence be known,” Leia told them, “Get a head start. He’ll follow.”

Finn and Rey shared a look, but they both nodded.

“Oh, and Rey,” Leia turned away, grabbing something cylindrical from a table. She offered it to Rey. A lightsaber. “This was Master Kenobi’s lightsaber,” Leia explained.

Rey took it, twisting the lightsaber in her hand, glancing over at the one Finn had attached to his belt. As if knowing what she wanted, he unattached it, passing it over to her so she could compare them.

In her left hand she held the lightsaber of Anakin Skywalker.

In the right, Obi-Wan Kenobi.

Both silver and black, Anakin’s cutting diagonal at the top, Obi-Wan’s rounded on the bottom. Rey passed Anakin’s back to Finn. Both clipping their respective lightsabers to their belt.

Rey looked up at Leia, smiling, “thank you.”

“Good luck, sweetheart,” Leia said to Rey, also smiling.  

Finn and Rey then ran off together, leaving the base.

When they were out of sight, Leia turned to a nearby Resistance soldier, “Have the flag raised!”

* * *

Back with the First Order, two troopers stood by a First Order banner. Its flag red, the symbol black in the centre.

In the distance a blue flag appearing. And although the symbol in its centre was too small to see, it could easily be guessed to be the flag of the Resistance.

One trooper turned to the other “Hey.”

“Yeah?” the second trooper replied.

“You ever wonder why we’re here?”

**Author's Note:**

> Lame Red vs Blue references from me :P  
> Thanks for reading! Leave a comment and/or kudos! <3 :D


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